Friday, August 27, 2010

so tired
so very tired

"Is this messed up random string of events called life? Cause its not worth living for. My sole salvation, I hope you find me soon."

I dont know. Life isnt going to get better after As. I'd think its going to go downhill from there. Thats because I dont find mugging the worst thing in life. Its solitude. And whats worse then that? Well thats something I cant say. Cause its so beautiful and elusive. Its my salvation from this meaningless existence. And I know I've lost it. I'm filled with remorse and regret. So I'll just carry on with what I do best. Ignore it, and keep it within me. I just want it. It. Yes I want a fucking piece of it. Get It?

Btw dear, this is what i meant by emo stuff that doesnt contain any negative feelings about you! Seriously, no sarcasm whatsoever.. so yea.

man this feeling sucks

Thursday, August 19, 2010

I cant differentiate reality from fiction, but im pretty sure it is happening again. Please dont treat me like nothing when I've been doing so much. I'm have mixed emotions now so please, just dispel them with one single word: Yes.

Thanks

in the darkness i seek solace in your image. (kktk 1:1)

in the light i search for your shadows (kktk 1:2)

in the nether your tenderness haunt me (kktk 1:3)

On a seperate topic, I cant believe I was so stupid. God I really know how to screw things up with you, to add doubt into the list of evils. i hate myself for being so blinded by jealously. I'll try to make sure it doesn't happen again. And i hate gapijgreaignfsklvhitapf.

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

One word is enough for doubts
One sentence is enough for anger
One event drowns you in sorrow
One tale breaks you

Oh this depressing hangover weights heavily down on my mind. Another round please.

The bitter-sweet taste beckons, my mind wanders.

What if?

Damn. Just buy me another round. For its the moment that matters, which can be relished and remembered forever. Feeding off memories will not satisfy one as much as being in the act. Thats why people drink, despite the

depressing hangovers.

That is why I drink, that is why I get drunk, that is why I must go back for more
All I need is that minutes of
Euphoria

Thursday, March 18, 2010

CT CAMP

HELLO GUYS!

Long time no blog! Anyways nth really much happened except CT camp during this holiday, which kinda drained out 3 days of my march holidays. Stupid camp. Sleep at 1am plus, wake up at 545am!!! zzz seniors need to wake up early to set good example wth:(

Anw this year initates kena slammed by norman and leong ying so much, damn scary haha! I mean they were abit uncaring for one another even compared to our year, but still quite ok overall i thought. But norman keep scolding and use the word bloody! hahahaa then they feedback they not comforatble with that term LOL. bunch of wusses bloody also not comfortable.

thankfully for the sleeping bag i was able to sleep at night and not get frozen in the air-con like adriel LOL. and I didnt pon during the camp whoo! big accomplishment!

A certain leadership body did a great job of pissing off the student populace again, and you begin to wonder how anyone with more than a speck of intelligence comes up with such a stupid idea. We all know that VJC has only 1 bathing bathroom behind the hall right? Trust the lame people to dirty the toilet ON PURPOSE with mud and eggs and flour and dunno what rubbish to allow their initiates to clean the toilet. WOW. Im sure thats a huge step forward for leadership training, and anw as i last recall, i dont remember any leadership body being in charge of cleaning toilets. Due to that, they hogged the toilet for like over a PRIME hour which many people needed to bathe (at least 300 students were in sch for various camps) and turned away all the bathers. When some persistent individuals pressed on to bathe, they said "eh CT interferring with our training arh?" HAHA unapologetic much? And what was the purpose of their training? To build teamwork? Let the initates understand that getting their hands dirty is part of the job? I cant think of a decent reason, and even if there was, Im sure there is literally, a hundred different ways to do them. Even so, why take the ONLY BATHING TOILET IN SCHOOL. Real intelligent i tell you. In their defence, they said not many people actaully went during that time, only alot of stubborn CT people who eventually bathed and spoiled their plans. You know why? Cause all the people of were rejected actually spread the word about the stupidity of the situation of of course no one went to bathe. Like duh. 2 thumbs up for CT who saved the day by overthrowing the senseless tyranny of the minority.

Ops. Sorry lost myself there bitching. Other than that nothing much happened during the camp, the usual blah blahs.

All events mentioned in this article is purely fictional and meant for entertainment purposes. Any resemblance to actual events or people are purely coincidental :)

Going out with des/cor woots! PPG lets go out too soon ok haha! bye!

Thursday, March 4, 2010

CTs are coming soon! Whoo. Lets get this over and done with! And move on to another term of mugging with 3x the topics to study! Bleak outlook on life huh.

Anyways, sometimes close friends can be freaking insensitive and irritating. But Nvm, take it in my stride. Cause I dont hate anyone.

And maybe I should stop studying like 1 month before any exams. Cause it apparently dont work at all even after continous mugging and practicing stuff. It sucks to be stupid yay! /sucide

Signing off.

Friday, February 5, 2010

Hellllllo World!

Today was Sea Sport Carnival! Went to school at 6am to carry stuff but spend most of the time stoning and wasting for bus and stuffs. I wish I wasnt the gamemaster for the stupid station. I WANT CLASS PICNIC AND PLAYING WITH FRIENDS :( AND CYCLING:( Oh well. Anws, my station was practically the worst station... The sun... was stupidly... hot... I wanted to tan my arms but my plan failed cause my sleeve kept dropping down so its like still white zz. Anw it was some soccer game so I had to keep running after the ball for them when they kicked out cause their legs were tied... Lucky it rained suddenly at around noon and they canceled the rest of the rotation! Woah another round of that and I would have just walked away due to dehydration(didnt drink anything in the sun for like 2 hours) and exhuastion. Damn.

Some stupid OGL also took my phone or something cause my belongings were near the class stuffs and brought it all the way back to school before he realized that the phone wasnt from anyone in his class. Failtard zz. OVERALL A BAD DAY. Cant believe I was rotting in the sun while everyone was playing and cycling and doing fun stuff. Didnt even get to see ctmm! darn. Must be fail sense of direction as always.

Oh and I ahvent eaten anything up till now, which is like 6pm, since i woke up at 5am. Talk about good dieting habits :D But I'm still heavy for some reason. Must be the muscles I built! /self decieve. YES ITS ALL MUSCLE WEIGHT ALL 7 KG OF IT!

The flower delivery thing for friendship day is also very, very irritating... Stupid teachers. SHIT THERES NO MORE TIME TO MAKE THE .....!

Oh and when I was walking home I was caught in the heaviest storm Ive ever seen, the wind could have blown my whole bag away if I wasnt cuddling it to protect my psp that was inside LOL. MIRACULOUSLY, my bag was almost dry when I was totally drenched when i was protecting my bag, Funny sia. Oh walking in the rain is a good way to emo btw, which is what Im feeling most of the recent days actually. I HATE YOU, YES I DO.

Ok, going to sleep :) LONG POST FTW!

Monday, February 1, 2010

yo!

Watched Invictus today at Lido, I've gotta say thats the worst cinema I've ever been to. Imagine a screen smaller then a projector screen at PT, added with chairs that are even more uncomfortable than LT1. I tell you, that chair is seriously a safety hazard. Fall asleep on those and i garuntee you will wake up with a broken neck HAHA.

Hating and loving this love-hate affair of unsuppressable feeling of unsatisfaction coupled with a weak willed mind and a liking for immediate comforts and disregard for the bleak future that beholds this, and creating hope out of insignificant thoughts just for myself to indulge in face of defeat and yearning.

Damn.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Hey all!

Went to the science center today, which was SURPIRSINGLY FUN?!
Lol after me and des spam science center like dno how many times for SMP, I'd thought I'll be like ZOMG save me I'm so going to stone. Surpirsingly, the BODY WORLD WAS DAMN BORING. And the fun part was at the science center exhibits itself! It changed kinda much during the past year and the sound exhibition was seriously fun sia. There was this echo tube which you shouted in and you can hear your echos, which was freaking hilarious cause I did charile the unicorn impersonation :D CHARRLIEEE. LETS GO TO CANDAY MOUNTAIN CHARRRLIEEEE.

Not to mention amelia and xenia who were like some boring parents who walked so slow and read every word of the body world exhibit till I was as restless like when my sis drags me out to some girls clothes shop or somthing. AHMA AMELIA! Lucky xm more fun, the button masher who kinda smashed every button that was smashable to see what different exhibits was about, and move on like once the exhibit started doing anything, or when she lost interest in the exhibit, which usually occured together. Trigger happy much?

Woah i actually tagged so much about a trip to the science center. Wtf is wrong with me! Im a freaking 18 year old for god's sake. Must be stupid corliss and her words of "Science center/discovery center/BIRD PARK(!!!)/zoo(!!!) are very cool and fun to go places!" Talk about fail outings and deprived childhood! HAHAHA <3

Anw! Walked around with ahma amelia in AMK hub (aleteration:AMK and Ahma Amelia), ate some stupidly disgusting soya bean ice cream from mr bean, which was definetely worse than that weird tomato juice cor let me try. It was really painful to eat that ice cream. I swear :( I was practically forcing it down my throat :( After that I found a really really cool present that des woula absolutely love so I bought it HAHA. 1 more brownie point desiree! 8 more to go for my reward ;)

Dunno why Im so high today, maybe its cuz of the whole orientation thingy at school. Oh well, better rush this stupid CTC thing i have looming above me. Sigh. See ya!

PS: lots of cute J1 girls this year. LOL.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

David Archuleta - Crush

I hung up the phone tonight
Something happened for the first time
Deep inside it was a rush, what a rush

Cause the possibility
That you would ever feel the same way
About me, just too much, just too much

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I just got to know

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it really just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
Cause I've tried and tried to walk away
But I know this crush ain't going away-ay-ay
Going away-ay-ay

Has it ever crossed your mind
When we're hanging, spending time girl?
Are we just friends? Is there more? Is there more?

See it's a chance we've gotta take
Cause I believe that we can make this into
Something that will last, last forever, forever!

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we could be, where this thing could go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it really just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
Cause I've tried and tried to walk away
But I know this crush ain't going away-ay-ay
Going away-ay-ay

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I just got to know

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we could be, where this thing could go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it really just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
?Cause I've tried and tried to walk away
But I know this crush ain?t going away-ay-ay
This crush ain't going away-ay-ay

Going away
Going away-ay-ay
Going away-ay-ay



Omg. I heard this song a long long time ago but I never ever read its lyrics. By far, the most Appropriate and best lyrics ever to describe my past year lol! Strangely, I'm not emo, rather I rather determined to erase that part of my tainted past. Cause its no point lying to myself, I know that theres only one option to choose from. haha! damn.

London choco roll¬

Monday, January 18, 2010

How did "cuz i know your problem" become "its your problem"! LOL! Talk about epic fail reading which made a concerned statement become a insult or something. hahahahaha!

Anw, Im yet again pissed at an old topic. It seems like history repeats itself again for some weird reason, and im pissed at the same girl yet again. I mean come on.... Dots man. Like an irritating mole that just permanent black face and spread words of dissent even though you're too nice to her. Wts man

And I do care whether we get to sit together, but as my last 20 smses has said, I really care and empatize about what you go through, and thus I dont want to make things harder for you, which is the reason I suggested fully no sitting tgt. Thus, I leave the choice up to you to make, cuz its "your"(as in not mine LOL) problem and thus you should decide :)

Hope that cleared the air lolol. You scared me with your last sms tone. See ya round. I think Im a rather well mannered individual and dont really like to use vulgarities too :)

By the way, FUCK YOU NO LIFE CHIDISH BASTARDS WITH NOTHING BETTER TO DO. GO ROLL INTO A DARK HOLE AND STAY THERE. :)

Seriously dude.

Saturday, January 16, 2010

Why am I posting so effing much when school has started and Im meant to be mugging ARGH.

THIS BLOG SHALL BE CLOSED. BYE.

Moving on. I dont know why Im having these Emo Swings. Its like, mood swings but I drift in and out of emo-ness. Wait... Emo is a mood right. Uhh, I guess that means Im having mood swings. Uh yea. Lets do this over again

Moving on. I dont know why Im having these MOOD swings. Its like, Im doing my work or something then suddenly I feel like OMG LIFE SUCKS and I start thinking how life sucks or something.

Anw, Bye.
I do think about you everyday :) :(

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Some S35 girls and guys really sucks.

Really really sucks.

I mean come on, its my life and our business, dont go make a mountain out of a moleehill. Yea sure you wanna bridge gaps by taking away 3 hours that we have in a week when you guys are all in the same class and go through 50 hour weeks together. So GTFO if you dont know anything and stop being bitching about other people being bitchy cause it only goes to show who the real bitches are. Fuck man.

zzz. Im angry for the 2nd time in my life, over an almost identical issue LOL. Screw this and get a life. No wonder she hates VJC.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Schools starting! LIKE FINALLY! yahoo. Lets all steel our minds so that we can turn into mugging machines(fail) that will mug 24/7(fail) and get staights As!(fail). New year resolutions are as follows...

1. Stop playing computer games (failed)
2. Stop thinking about girls (failed)
3. Stop dreaming with the notes in front of me (failed)
4. Go onto msn less often (failed)
5. Accomplish 1/10 of mugging goals (passed)

I wonder which stalker still visit this blog :) cmon dont be shy, tag on the tagboard:)

I hope I'm not being made use of. If so, then burn. In the firey depths :)

Uhh yea. Cant help being emo huh. Time to prepare for school!
 

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